Before the snow storm of January 25th hit, my wife texted me the following message: "Wegmans is out of potatoes."
Now, this is a serious matter, since potato soup goes along quite nicely with snow storms. But you know what? Secretly, we love the massive snow storm. We may not love two or three massive snow storms, so we're glad we got skipped this past weekend, but we love the first one of the season.
Understand that I am not a chionophile, which I just discovered is a person who loves the cold, especially snow. Far from it. I don't ski, and more to the point, I don't shovel. Long ago, I reached a satisfactory agreement with a neighborhood business that has preserved my back and saved me from frostbite, though watching someone else shovel in zero degree weather when you're camped out with Netflix and a cocktail does make one understand why the French Revolution occurred.
Anyway, I believe we love the storm, even though we complain about the inconveniences it has foisted upon us. For a variety of reasons.
For one thing, we love to complain about swarms of our fellow citizens buying up milk and eggs and potatoes in the Lehigh Valley's version of The Hunger Games because it's not our fault, it's their fault. "We're being very calm and measured. We'll eat rice if there's no potatoes and we can go without eggs for a few days, for God's sake. Boy, our neighbors are crazy. Honey, go grab that final quart of milk before that elderly woman in a wheelchair gets it."
Second, the giant snow storm gives us the opportunity to do nothing. We are basically a nation that lives like Hedonists, but we think like Calvinists. Even us retirees worry about not working; about not doing something. A snow storm allows us the freedom to say, "We can't do anything. We would love to go to work or go to the gym, but we can't. Fate has conspired us to a day of doing nothing."
Third, food. We have time to kill. Therefore, we have no excuse not to prepare things that otherwise we would not have attempted. I'm not a baker, but during this recent snow storm I announced that I was going to make a Boston creme pie. Okay, the creme didn't come out as thick as it should've, so it was more of a Boston cremeless pie, but it was delicious and I would not have made it if not for the storm. The negative addendum being there's also substantial time to eat the whole damn thing.
Fourth, a day of doing nothing is good for the soul, good for the nervous system. Two days of doing nothing, maybe three days? Well, that's pushing it. And granted, more than a few divorces have come out of couples being locked together for more than 48 hours.
Fifth, studies have shown that falling snow makes a very subtle sound that echoes the sound of a white noise machine; that stimulates more activity in the area of the brain responsible for rest and relaxation. So it is quite possible that if you listen to the snow, it will make you more relaxed, as long as you block out the sounds of snow plows.
Sixth and finally, a snow storm taps into childhood memories. As soon as it starts to snow, I think of my neighborhood in May's Landing, New Jersey. There were seven of us, all relatively the same age, and we just kind of magically converged when it snowed. Snow brought us together. No other weather event comes close to evoking those kinds of fond memories.
The Lehigh Valley's enduring cold weather does make it harder to appreciate this recent snowfall. But enjoy it while you can. Scientists who study cold weather trends are consistent in their conclusion that, due to rising temperatures, snowfall will be increasingly rare. Yes, you might be able to get your quota of potatoes, but like so many things, you're gonna miss it when it's gone.
