Smells Like Teen Starbucks

Jun 28, 2019
Originally published on November 1, 2019 10:07 am

In this music trivia round, the words of famous grunge songs are changed to describe things in and from the Seattle area.

Heard on: Nicole Byer: Nailed It!

Copyright 2019 NPR. To see more, visit https://www.npr.org.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

JONATHAN COULTON: This is NPR's ASK ME ANOTHER, coming to you from Seattle, Wash. I'm Jonathan Coulton. Here's your host, Ophira Eisenberg.

(APPLAUSE)

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

Thank you, Jonathan. Before the break, we met our contestants, Lynsi and Dennis. Our next game is about grunge music. But first, let's check in with our contestants. Lynsi, it's great to be on ASK ME ANOTHER. We are happy to have you, and I know you're happy to be here. But I'm told that your dream is to be on "The Price Is Right."

LYNSI BURTON: Oh, absolutely. That's No. 1. I've wanted that since, pretty much, birth. Yeah. There is video footage of me on a VHS somewhere of my grandmother giving me one of those Echo Microphones you plug into a radio.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

BURTON: And she says on the video, it's 'cause she loves Bob Barker so much. We wanted to give her a microphone for her to play with. Yeah.

EISENBERG: Do you memorize prices of things?

BURTON: You know, I used to. When I was a kid, I was so obsessed, I would, like, write down the prices...

EISENBERG: No way.

BURTON: ...In a journal to, like, see if I could, like, quiz myself for when I was going to be on there. You know, I work now, so I can't watch it all the time.

EISENBERG: Do you want to just yell one dollar right now - just want to yell one dollar?

BURTON: One dollar, Bob.

(LAUGHTER)

BURTON: And it still should be Bob.

EISENBERG: (Laughter) Dennis, in college, you were the University of Wyoming's mascot, Pistol Pete.

(LAUGHTER)

DENNIS FEENEY: That's right. Yeah. My junior year, I applied for the position and got it. And it was a scholarship position, so...

EISENBERG: Wow. Is Pistol Pete an animal?

FEENEY: He's a cowboy.

EISENBERG: He's a cowboy.

FEENEY: Yeah.

EISENBERG: Yeah, OK.

FEENEY: Yeah.

EISENBERG: And so what intrigued you to take this job as a mascot?

FEENEY: Yeah, I think - bored. And I'm kind of goofy, so it - I was like, oh, this kind of sounds like fun. Wouldn't this be great to be an animated character?

EISENBERG: And was it fun?

FEENEY: Oh, yeah. Yes, lots of fun. Yeah. I was really good at crowd surfing. I would also ride down the stadium steps on mattresses.

EISENBERG: What?

FEENEY: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

FEENEY: People would jump on with me, and it was fun.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Dennis, you're a good man. OK. So your next game is a music parody called Smells Like Teen Starbucks.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Lynsi, stay in the lead, and you're in the final round. Dennis, you need to get more points, or you have to move to Portland.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: The Pacific Northwest gave birth to grunge music and also omnipresent corporations that permeate every aspect of our lives.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: In this game, we rewrote grunge classics to make them about things that were invented or began in Seattle. So ring in and tell me what I'm singing about. And if you get that right, for a bonus point, you can name the original song or artist who made it famous. All right. Here we go. (Singing) Sunday morning, it's time to buy a Kirkland steak, Kirkland wine.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: (Singing) Try free samples, grab a 64-ounce jar of mayonnaise, mayonnaise.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Dennis.

FEENEY: That's Costco.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

COULTON: It is Costco. Correct.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: For a bonus point, can you name the original song or artist?

FEENEY: Nirvana.

COULTON: Yeah, that's right - "Lithium."

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Here's your next one. (Singing) He's just a little dead in his hospital bed. We'll start his heart with this instead. Just yell, clear, and go ahead - clear.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Dennis.

FEENEY: A defibrillator.

COULTON: Yeah, that's right.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Apparently started in Seattle, the defibrillator.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

COULTON: Did not know this. Dennis, for a bonus point, can you name the original song or artist?

FEENEY: I'm going to pander to the crowd. Is that "Mudhoney"?

COULTON: No, I'm sorry. It is not.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: That was L7 - "Pretend We're Dead." Here's your next one. (Singing) Paddle sport on a court, like cucumbers in brine. Trendy sport - on a court they cavort.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Dennis.

FEENEY: Pickleball.

COULTON: Pickleball is the answer.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: For a bonus point, can you name the original song or artist?

FEENEY: Soundgarden.

COULTON: Yeah, that's right - "Black Hole Sun."

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: OK, here's your next one. (Singing) Those luscious buns at the airport - got in line 'cause it smelled so good. Icing swirl, icing swirl and a thousand pounds of sugar. I eat half and regret it.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Lynsi.

BURTON: Cinnabon.

COULTON: Yeah, that's right.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: For a bonus point, can you name the song or artist?

BURTON: Stone Temple Pilots.

COULTON: Yeah - "Plush."

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: This is your last clue. (Singing) You're the guy in shorts that I am waiting for. If I'm not at home, you leave it by the door. Your truck is plain brown, but there's a gold smidge. Someday, you'll handle my package.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: (Singing) Someday, you'll handle my package.

EISENBERG: Goodness.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Lynsi.

BURTON: UPS.

COULTON: Yeah, that's correct.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: Can you name the song or artist?

BURTON: I don't think we've said Alice in Chains yet.

COULTON: It's a fine guess, but it's incorrect. That was Hole - "Doll Parts." How'd they do, Ophira?

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: OK, so it was incredibly close. Great job, both of you. And Dennis is moving on to our final round.

(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.